The latest volume in this joyous series takes a more serious turn while flipping the script completely on the cold, distant Sabrian, who until now has been Blanche’s father and Abigail’s husband in name only. Crucially, this volume reveals the root of Sabrian’s aversion to women, and tragically, it lies in childhood sexual abuse. The topic is handled sensitively through implication rather than direct depiction, while a message of hope unfolds through the chapters as Sabrian begins to take steps toward healing. Meanwhile, Blanche too is growing more and more confident, expressing her own likes and dislikes and taking the initiative, instead of remaining cowed before the adults who seek to control her. The royal family is being transformed! And it’s all thanks to Abigail. In short, this series just keeps getting better and better! 

Now for a spoilerific dive into the surprising depths of Not-Sew-Wicked Stepmom Volume 3!

See also reviews of Vol. 1 // Vol. 2

Initial Reactions:

claire: There is a sweetness here that soothes the soul. It isn’t just candy floss and cuteness, but rather, Abigail’s genuine kindness and delight in this volume creates a context in which hurting souls may find respite and, we are gradually beginning to see, eventually heal. She may have started out just a fangirl, as she herself says, but now Abigail is bringing transformative love onto the scene. Beautiful! 

sleepminusminus: The moment this volume arrived in the mail I dropped everything I was doing to binge it. And I have to say, I find myself sympathizing with Abigail in her fangirling over how adorable Blanche is—even just the cover is unbearably adorable on its own! Besides that, I have to echo claire: here we have a volume with sweet tones but also savory ones as well, one that portrays its characters with sensitivity and emotional clarity while cheering them on all the while. In conclusion: volume 4 when?

When Childhood Trauma is Met with Compassion and Empathy:

claire: It is too easy to forget that boys and young men can be victims of sexual abuse, and women, the perpetrators. I applaud the courage of the original author, Iru, in tackling this subject and reminding us that abuse and abusers do not always look like what we expect, even today, when society is much more open about discussing such difficult matters as abuse, trauma, and mental health. I also appreciated the way that artist Mo9Rang handled the depiction of Sabrian’s traumatizing experiences, without either sensationalizing the images or diminishing the impact on Sabrian in those moments. 

Counterbalancing the harrowing flashbacks to Sabrian’s childhood, is the tender compassion with which Abigail responds to his heart-wrenching story. Rather than reacting in a (melo)dramatic way, she simply sits in the discomfort with him. Abigail gives him the time and space he needs, remaining present consistently, while yet resisting the urge to rush him along the path to healing or forcing a change in his behavior. This is patience and long suffering–that is, love–in action, because Sabrian’s trauma also hurts her in the way it causes him to reject her, yet she does not make her hurt the center of the story here. Instead, Abigail sits with him solely for his own sake, and not for any benefit of her own. And by just sitting, she shows compassion for Sabrian as surely as when she cries for him. 

sleepminusminus: And not only sitting in the discomfort with him, but mourning for him! Sabrian’s so locked into his duty as king that he doesn’t even view his lost innocence as something to mourn—his response to Abigail’s tears isn’t sorrow but bewilderment. Abigail’s tears melt away his walls and help him to genuinely heal. Her grief reconfigures his pain into something that he can heal from, rather than something to dismiss.

Sabrian is able to mourn through Abigail’s tears. And because he’s able to mourn he can also imagine what it would look like to heal, as terrifying and difficult as that road may be. And that’s why it’s so important for us as people to create loving and gentle communities that welcome those who are hurting. It’s only in places like this that deep-seated hurt can be acknowledged, mourned, and healed from.

claire: Wow, so good! You are so right that Abigail’s empathy—allowing herself to be moved emotionally on someone else’s behalf—is so powerful and effective here in empowering the victimized Sabrian. It’s not just her compassion alone.

Blanche, Abigail, and How to Do Family:

claire: Blanche is really starting to come into her own in this volume! First, with her father, initiating an important conversation with him while trembling the whole while (bless her little cotton stockings!), and then with the aptly named Karen, who is quite nasty about Abigail. Both sequences are effectively confrontations, yet Blanche retains such a soft heart toward both adults even when challenging their behavior toward her now beloved step-mom. Blanche’s love is expressed through her protectiveness and loyalty, and it empowers her blossoming confidence and determination, while drawing her closer to those around her, even when she disagrees with them. Beautiful!

sleepminusminus: So true! It’s like the modeling concept you introduced in our review of volume one, claire; Abigail softly encourages Blanche to work towards something better in this family through her encouragement and example. Where Blanche used to speak about Abigail with fear and trembling, now she defends her mother as someone to look up to, an example that Karen should imitate. 

Modeling in parenthood isn’t forcing your child down a particular path; it’s calibrating a compass that can guide them along their journey. That’s how Abigail approaches her relationship with Abigail as she gives her opportunities to express herself through choosing her own clothing, dancing with her and encouraging her small successes, letting her socialize freely while protecting her from serious harm. Her actions remind me of an analogy I’ve heard: one shouldn’t create a tidal wave that children can’t resist, but rather a gentle river flow so that children have a stream to follow into flourishing life.

claire: Yes! And to switch up the metaphor here a bit, Abigail is creating a space where it is safe to fall: a place where Blanche and Sabrian can begin to take risks as they step out in pursuit of becoming the people they had perhaps given up on ever being, that is, people free from the constraints of the fear and hurt that others had introduced into their lives. 

For instance, by letting Blanche choose her own dress, as you mentioned sleepy, and even invite an enemy (Karen) to tea, Abigail gives the young girl agency. Meanwhile, she respects Sabrian’s boundaries, while also not recoiling or distancing herself from him, instead, holding herself in place patiently, remaining available without expectations. And that little tug of hers on his shirt sleeve while affirming that they can still be family even if they can’t be husband and wife? Oh my heart. 

sleepminusminus: I’ve reread that scene a few times over the past few weeks. Such a lovely and tender moment… I also loved the dancing scene, where we get to see Abigail and Sabrian display attentiveness and love to one another. Abigail leads Sabrian and handles the social tension, while Sabrian catches her when she falls, even as his hands are trembling. Love like that—sacrificial, humble love—sows seeds that bloom into flourishing relationships.

Cuteness is Justice OR Meaningful Expressiveness:

sleepminusminus: Throughout this series, I’ve loved Mo9Rang’s zany character art. Volume two reminded me of Bocchi the Rock! with the depths it was willing to probe in contorting and morphing Abigail’s facial expressions. With this volume, though, I noticed that beyond the cute and absurd facial expressions lies something deeper. As characters move towards a greater degree of freedom and joy, they also expand into a wider variety of expressions. 

Abigail, for instance, is happier than ever: unchained by worries about her status as queen, supported by her peers for the first time, free to dote on her adorable step-daughter. And it shows. Sabrian’s been saying that Abigail now shows a wider variety of expressions than she did a few months ago, when she was still her vengeful and bitter pre-reincarnation self. The same people who once recoiled at her smile now join her in joy as she extols the virtues of dressmaking.

This point also ties into how Abigail, coming from a world with fewer restrictions on etiquette, is working to change the restrictive social norms of her kingdom. Nobles are expected to mask their feelings with a smile and to employ their words like venomous barbs. But Abigail is generously honest and kind, freely gushing about fashion or her daughter to anyone who will listen. In fact, it’s only when she’s hurting, like when Sabrian refuses to dance with her, that she hides her emotions.

There’s a really great point hidden in all this about how openness to others—especially to those who care about us and seek our genuine good—can lead to healing. Something in our hearts delights in freedom and openness. We don’t thrive in the dark, hiding things from others. As Amos writes, justice flows like a river: wild, uncontrolled, and joyous.

I’m also reminded of Psalm 32. When the Psalmist keeps his sin to himself, he wastes away in groaning and loses his strength, but when he confesses his sin in the presence of God and others, he experiences forgiveness and freedom. When we hide our true selves, we give into hurt and sorrow. But when we open our honest selves to God and to others, we find healing.

claire: This is a great insight! And how interesting it is that this drive for emotional honesty, stripping away the masks of court life and casting off the restraints of propriety (particularly around physical appearance), is coming from a fashion designer and someone who died in her previous life effectively from trying to conform to the social pressures our society today (and perhaps particularly in Korea) places on young women—the impossible ideal of the overworking business woman who is slim and trim and finely turned out at all times. Abigail is, in effect, walking the walk without even talking it, and in doing so, she’s changing lives and even high society itself. Now, it’s time for Karen to come under her transformative, life-giving spell! I feel a redemption arc coming in Volume 4!

sleepminusminus: Yes! I’m so excited for Karen to find the newfound joy that Blanche, Abigail, and Sabrian now share.

Outro: 

Overall, volume three is a sweet blend of father-mother-daughter bonding, fashion breakthroughs, romantic moments, and hilarious misunderstandings. But there’s more to come on the horizon, including some power struggles behind the scenes and Karen’s highly-anticipated redemption arc. Will Sabrian ever realize that his wife is just a tsundere and isn’t actually worried about showing him affection? Will Abigail manage to think up another breakthrough dress design? And most importantly, will Blanche ever stop getting cuter on these cover designs? For answers to these questions and more, we’ll see you in volume four.

Not-Sew-Wicked Stepmom is published by Ize Press, and imprint of Yen Press

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Manhwa Review: Not-Sew-Wicked Stepmom Vol. 1