It’s difficult to be both sensitive and direct. In Naho’s case so far, she’s usually been one of either. She’s young and naïve, and although she never wants to hurt anyone, she can still speak carelessly. She’s especially oblivious to times when saying nothing is the most hurtful thing of all. Although she’s changed, she still mistakes silence for gentleness, unaware that her lack of motivation is not helping anyone, Kakeru least of all.
We need balance. Of course it’s important to care about people’s hearts and not say things needlessly, but sometimes difficult things need to be said for everyone’s benefit. I think it’s natural for us to speak without thinking, but in some ways it’s worse to think about something important but never, ever say it, which we do far too often, especially when it’s because we hate conflict.
When Suwa and Naho confront Kakeru in this episode, it’s true that their opening was a little rough. I’m not exactly sure why they thought it was fine to tell him not to go see his old friends when they supposedly know nothing about them. Despite this, they eventually properly communicate that he was hurting everyone by holding his feelings back. It was especially necessary for him to know that it wasn’t his fault. Naho failed to say so earlier because she was so insecure, but Suwa got right to the heart of the matter, and I think in time she will change even more by working together with him.
Unfortunately, Kakeru is probably still holding things back from them to his own detriment, but if they’re patient they will likely find a way to save him anyways. Love is gentle and kind, but love also protects, and you can’t protect the hearts of others while protecting your own comfort zones. Obviously, Kakeru’s friends don’t have a right to know anything about his life, or it wouldn’t be friendship. But by refusing to let them support him, he’s not helping anyone, he’s really hurting them, and the only thing he’s protecting is his own sense of isolation.
Even if you don’t do things perfectly, if you keep on loving people it will reach them. We can’t always make sure our gestures of kindness are perfectly sensitive and tactful, because life is not lived in retrospect. Sometimes we are going to make mistakes, bur mistakes do not give us an excuse to stop trying. If we are to love others as God wants us to, we must not only love them when it’s easy, but when it’s difficult and we can’t think of the words to say. God is gentle and loving, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t convict us when it’s for our good. If we are to become like him, we need to have the courage to step outside our selfish avoidance and let others know that they are valued and loved, even when we’d rather run away.
This episode was beautiful, heartbreaking, and the best one yet. I’m especially sad that it sounds like Kakeru’s relationship with his mother was emotionally abusive, and it’s still doing damage. Getting Suwa involved has really changed the story. I am so glad Kakeru and Naho understand each other’s feelings now; it would have been slightly painful if it had taken the rest of the anime, like many others of the romance genre. I’m starting to really suspect that the rest of their friend group also got letters. My biggest question, though, is how many more tissues I’m going to need if the story is going to get sadder than this, because I’m certain it inevitably will.
- The 12 Days of Christmas Anime, Day 11: Angel Beats! - 12.24.2018
- Lynna’s Journey (Entry #8): Where Would You Like To Be? - 11.28.2018
- Lynna’s Journey (Entry #7) The Old and The New - 11.07.2018
I just catched up with Orange and I decided to read your blogs of Orange. I’m really amazed by the fact that you manage to catch the most important parts of an episode and you also find a connection to the Bible, in particular love towards people and God.
I think that what you said about friendship is true. If you like each other when its easy, but not when there are hard times. I don’t think you can consider that a friend. Knowing this I sometimes look to my ‘friends’ and I wonder if they’ll still consider me a friend when there will come hard times. I’m only 14 and I’ve been at more then 6 different schools and even more different classes. Because of this I barely have any friends I’ve known very long. It’s not that I’m really bothered by that fact- I usually manage to fit in a class soon, while I’m being true to my own character- But more because I’m worried that they might not like me when I’ll have a hard time. (On the other hand…I can’t say for sure if I’ll keep being with my friends when they’ll have a hard time. This only applies for some of them though)
So yeah, when I read articles like this, that are about those topics, I feel myself confronted with them. In this article especially the part of just saying things without giving it any second thought, but when it comes to your own problems that you usually hide them from your friends.
Well…I was (and sometimes I still am) a kid that was hard to handle. I won’t go into details. But my parents somehow managed to get me back on the right path. I believe God did this through the love of my parents for me.
My life story aside, I tend to believe that Kakeru will still die (I’ve not read the manga or watched the life action movie so I don’t know if this will be a spoiler) But this time it might not be suicide. I think it will be a real accident. But again, that’s only my theory.
But will Kakeru realize that he has real friends? If you look at this episode I would say yes…You have hope, faith and love. Hope and faith will be fullfilled. Love will stay. But will love always find a way?
I’m sorry for the long reply… It turned out longer than I intended to and it also went into another direction then I had first in mind
Thank you so much for your comment! I’m really glad you enjoy my posts, and find them insightful, that means a lot. Friendship is one of my favourite things to talk about, and I’m really interested in the way it’s presented in this story.
Switching schools six times sounds rough. I had a lot of trouble making friends when I was in high school, and a lot of the friends I did have I didn’t really see myself as close to. Now I see that I was afraid of being hurt, and I wish I had been a little bit more open to them about the things I was struggling with. It probably would have made everything a lot easier. But of course, it’s easier to think these sorts of things in retrospect. Funnily enough, some of those friendships have surprised me by continuing far beyond high school and becoming a lot closer than I ever thought they would be. I would like to encourage you to reach out to some of your friends and find out what happens!
I sadly wouldn’t be surprised if Kakeru dies anyways, though that’s not the ending I want. But I think they might succeed in saving him by making him know that he is loved and treasured before he dies.
(Also, don’t worry about the long reply, those are the best kind!)