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Good Friday is a day of contemplation for Christians across the globe as we head into the more celebratory Resurrection Sunday. It’s a time for prayer, meditation, and thankfulness for Christ as we remember his crucifixion. But while the weekend is typically a festive time for Christians, it doesn’t feel that way for many. It may not feel that way for you. Difficulties with relationships, at work, with the church, and generally in life can sometimes make us feel distant from God, as if the resurrection story—though we know it to be true—is far away, that the God who once spoke into our lives is now silent. But Good Friday reminds us that God’s love is steadfast, enduring, and perhaps not as quiet as we may feel it is.
The Easter story, interestingly enough, has moments of silence juxtaposed against those that are quite loud. Early in the week, Jesus overturns the tables at the temple courts in what was surely a moment that led to angry screams and a riotous atmosphere; then later in the week, He seeks time away from the crowds and in prayer. Even that prayer time is a mixture, with Jesus crying out in agony to his Father while his inner circle, who have joined him, dozes off. The next day, before Pilate, the crowds screamed, “Crucify him! Crucify him!” while several days later, the disciples hid from these crowds and the religious leaders, mostly in silence, I imagine, absolutely crushed by the death of their teacher and fearing that they would be executed next. And perhaps most significantly, Jesus cries out “Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?”, meaning, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” While on the cross, Jesus himself screams about silence.
That scene from the cross, where Jesus himself is crying to the Father about his “silence,” reminds me of the martyrs’ deaths in the classic Japanese novel, Silence, and of Martin Scorsese’s brilliant adaptation of the film. In the story, Father Rodrigues, a passionate young man who dreams of the glories of martyrdom, begins to lose faith as Japanese Christians are tortured and killed. The shogunate intends to destroy Christianity not by martyring the missionaries, but by doing so to the converts until those very missionaries apostasize to end those torturous executions. It’s a cruel and brilliant method. And as those he loves suffer, Rodrigues wonders where God is; he wonders why God is silent.
Our circumstances 500 years later are rarely so dire, yet the feeling of distance from God can be just as real to us. The thought that He doesn’t care can haunt us just as powerfully as it did Rodrigues. The ending of Silence, however, has something to say about the reality from the other side of the coin, from God’s perspective. The novel concludes (spoilers ahead) on what has been called a “maddening” note, with author Shusaku Endo never clearly sharing whether Rodrigues returned to his faith after apostasizing or not. Scorsese’s ending is a little clearer, showing Rodrigues grasping a cross hidden in his hand during his cremation ceremony.

The inference is that Rodrigues, who outwardly apostasized, kept his inner relationship with God alive. In fact, I would contend that a further inference is that, like Peter after his denials, Rodrigues was restored. Much like Peter, Rodrigues started out as an impetuous youth declaring his readiness to die for Jesus, but when tested, he couldn’t withstand the evils and suffering of persecution. Yet, God restores him. As the novel begins, Rodrigues is immature and frankly, obnoxious; although we don’t get to spend time with the older Rodrigues, the assumption is that having aged, gone through the worst of ordeals, and holding onto his faith (literally) at the very end, he is now like the restored Peter, with a far deeper and more mature relationship with God.
That’s one of the great messages to take away from Silence. You may not be hearing from God the way you hope to. You may be suffering and hurting. You may even be considering abandoning him, but he is ever-working to draw you near. God is walking with you and embracing you through the pain. In the suffering. In the silence.

If you are in that place of sadness and disbelief this Easter weekend, I want to leave you with a passage that encourages me when I feel discouraged in my faith:
We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
~ 2 Corinthians 4:8-9
Paul, the writer of 2 Corinthians, has felt the pressures from within the church and without, and ranging from words of betrayal to actual attempts at his execution. He is hurting inside and out. But Paul will endure until his own death. He is “struck down, but not destroyed,” empowered by a God who would never “abandon” him.
Neither has Christ abandoned you. The cross and resurrection are evidence of that, the proof of his love. The sinful world and the devil and his agents are conspiring against you, but God is working to bring you to him. He cares about you deeply. May you remember this thunderous love. And may it cut through the pain and silence on this Easter weekend.
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